Paraphrased from ESPN Radio’s “The Herd” with Colin Cowherd:

Colin was talking to Ryan Miller, the US Men’s Hockey goaltender. Miller said he was spotted by a group of Canadians, one who pointed out who exactly Miller was. They all turned and glared, and in unison shouted, “HEY MILLER, F*#& YOUR MOTHER!”

No they didn’t. “HEY A$#HOLE! YOU SUCK!”

Nope.

Instead, this crowd of Canadians heckled Miller by shouting, “GO CANADA!”

They then turned and left without even so much as throwing a Labatt Blue bottle.

OT GWG vs Flyers:

EA Sports: OT GWG at Philly

Face off one timer vs Rangers:

EA Sports: Faceoff one timer

Lundqvist, deked:

EA Sports: Pwned Lundqvist

Let me start off by saying Brett Favre will go down as one of the greatest quarterbacks the world has ever seen. Statistically. The guy holds records for passing yards, touchdowns, completions, and consecutive games started to name a few. But I HATE Brett Favre.

Michael Jordan shocked the world when he retired from the NBA. No one could have possibly seen it coming. His father had been tragically murdered, and Mike cited his father’s desire to see his play baseball as a major reason for his retirement.  It didn’t work for him though- he was human with a bat in hand.

Less than a year later, the sports world went into a frenzy over two words: “I’m back.”  MJ would lead the Bulls once again. Some familiar faces were still there, most notably Scottie Pippen, Mike’s right hand man. Several of the others were gone. But the arguably most important piece was there: head coach Phil Jackson. They did it again- three consecutive championships in 96, 97, and 98. In the 1998 NBA Finals, Jordan made magic again. At the top of the key, he drained a shot over Utah’s Byron Scott to seal the series. As he let it go, Mike left his hand hanging in the air until the shot fell.

It was the last game Jordan played in a Chicago Bulls uniform, but the basketball world was satisfied. Michael Jordan would end his career on a high note, and would always be remembered for the shot. He officially announced his retirement in the off-season in 1999. But he didn’t stay away.

In 2001, Michael was working in the front offices of the Washington Wizards. The team was doing horribly. The hero returned as a Washington Wizard. It was the first time in his professional career that he wouldn’t be a Bull. And it was bad. Mike’s age had caught up to him. An injury to his knee shortened his first season back to just 60 games. Younger players like Allen Iverson had become the superstars of the league. Mike played two seasons for the Wizards, and retired for the last time.

I say all of this to say that I don’t hate Brett Favre for retiring, un-retiring, retiring, etc.- I hate Brett because of the attention he clearly craves. Brett retired after the 2006 season, Brett had tears in his eyes when he announced that he was done playing professional football. I felt for him, I really did. He was a man walking away from what he did best, and did better than most anyone else.

In the off-season, there were rumors that Brett was considering coming back to play for the Packers again. He announced shortly before the start of the season that he would return. Brett lead the Packers deep into the playoff, all the way to the NFC Championship. The problem was a Giant one. More accurately, the New York Giants. The Giants were on a tear, and they handed Brett a loss in his final game at Lambeau Field.

It was a rough ending to a good season. He retired again, declining to play in the Pro Bowl, where the fans had voted him to play. Once again, Brett stated a desire to play again. You’d think after all he did for the team the previous year, they would welcome him with open arms. Instead, the team had already retooled the offense to fit Favre’s former backup, Aaron Rodgers.

Brett fought like mad to have the Packers bring him back. The Pack didn’t want him there, going as far as offering him some $20 million to essentially stay retired.  In the end, they agreed on one thing: a trade to the New York Jets. For only the second time in his career, and the first since he’d become a household name, Favre wasn’t going to be a Packer. For the most part, Jets fans were elated to have the old gunslinger in their fold. They were unhappy, disappointed with Chad Pennington and his weak arm.  Favre would be a hero if he could just throw the ball deep down-field for Laveranues Coles and Jerricho Cotchery to haul in.  And boy did he throw it.

You see- Favre fans often leave out one of his NFL records: 310 interceptions.  More than anyone else by 33.  The funny part?  The guy with 277 played 25 YEARS to Favre’s 18.  His 464 TDs is more than any other, which is indeed impressive, but his season as a Jet was lackluster, and somewhat deceiving.

Favre finished the season with 22 TDs and 22 INTs.  Down the stretch, though, Brett fell apart.  The team he had guided to a respectable 8-3(with 20 TDs and only 11 INTs, a good line) through 11 games had a solid shot at the playoffs in the tougher American conference, and more surprisingly in one of the more heated divisions.  The last 5 games of the season? 1-4.  2 TDs, 11 INTs. What the stats really don’t tell you in the big picture is if you remove week 4 from Brett’s season stats, he’s left with 16 TDs and 21 INTs.  14 TDs and 10 INTs in the other 7 games.  Hardly legendary.

This off-season, Brett did something that pretty much guaranteed his return to the league- he had surgery on an arm that he claimed wasn’t injured.  Since then, the Minnesota Vikings have expressed an interest in Favre.  A team who really had a solid shot at a deep playoff run last season, save for their lack of identity at the quarterback spot.

Brett is destroying his legacy. I guess, in the end, I feel valid for not liking Brett Favre.  I’ve never been the drama/big commotion kind of guy.  Shied away from it in school, stay away from it at work, I just don’t like it.  But God help me, if Brett’s playing ensures I’ll never see another of his Wrangler or Prilosec commercials, then let’s see the return of the Purple People Eaters.  Brett: please, just this one time- don’t be like Mike.

The Orlando Magic did NOT win tonight’s game 6 of the NBA’s Eastern Conference Finals.  They didn’t out play the Cavaliers.  The refs didn’t miss calls on either side of the court.

The Cleveland Cavaliers GAVE the Magic this game.

For the first five games of this series, arguably an even bigger series than 2007’s NBA finals, LeBron James hoisted the Cavs on his back for 5 games.  In all 5 of those games, LeBron was INHUMAN.  He was like the X-Man you never heard of.  His superpower? To play ball like very few have been able to.

Statistically, you could argue that LeBron was the greatest player to don a uniform for any team in the history of the league for those five games.  Through five games, he was averaging more than 42 points, 8 rebounds, and 8 assists a game.  Numbers no one else could boast.  Not many can come near the 42+ points he was averaging.

Game 6? A decent 25 points.  An average you’d expect of a starting two-guard in the regular season.  Still grabbed 7 boards.  Still dished 7 assists.  Good numbers, but not the numbers of The Next One.  LeBron did what he could do.

Through five games, there was little to no support.  Mo Williams, the team’s second leading scorer throughout the regular season, and thought by many to be the guy who really addressed the point guard problem in Cleveland, was inconsistant at best.  He made a brash prediction before game 4 that Cleveland would win, and at the end of the game, the stats told he had a lot to do with their loss.  5 of 15 shooting including 0 for 3 from outside the three point line.  2 assists.  Sure, he got the 18 he averaged during the regular season, but when your point guard can’t hit his shot, and isn’t handing out assists like penny candy, you’re not going to win many games.

Delonte West, essentially a nobody before he came to Cleveland, was putting up decent numbers, though only averaging 12 points in the regular season.  He made it 13 in the post-season.

Zydrunas Ilgauskas, the aging center did little to help, although he wasn’t seeing much action, barely touching the ball, and probably shot more from 20 feet than he did under the basket.  Unexcusable for a guy with a 7 plus foot frame.

And don’t even get me started on flop-master Anderson Varejao.  Or Aleksander Pavlovic, who played 2007 like a star.  Wally Szczerbiak who was one of the finer players I’ve ever seen in the NCAA tournament, who is aging much more quickly than he should be.  Former rebounding/blocking terror Ben Wallace.  And “Boobie” Gibson, whose electric shooting all but disappeared altogether this year.

These Cavs- who put together a 66-16 record this season, who ran rampant through the Detroit Pistons and Atlanta Hawks, sweeping both teams in spectacular fashion, who played SO WELL in the regular season that LeBron James was rarely seen in a 4th quarter- absolutely fell apart during the most important part of their season to that point.  In the Eastern Conference Finals, the Cavs were merely another team in Orlando’s way.

Orlando, who needed six games to overcome the Philadelphia 76ers, and seven games to defeat a Kevin Garnett-less Boston Celtics team ran rampant through the league’s best team.  Were it not for a spectacular performance and incredible last second three-pointer by LeBron in game 4, this series would have already been over.

What made Orlando tick?  Their starting five had no flashes of brilliance.  Dwight Howard, a perennial All Star averaged only 20 points a game. However, lump in Rashard Lewis’ 20, Hedo Turkoglu’s 15, Rafer Alston’s 13, and even Mickael Pietrius’ 10 off the bench, and they’re not too bad.  Courtney Lee split starts with Duke stand-out J.J. Redick, averaged 9 points a game.

Orlando played team ball, and they played it well.  But what isn’t shown on the score sheet is how Cleveland chose to play the Magic, and how the Magic chose to play them.

Larry Bird once said of Michael Jordan that the Celtics would let Jordan score all he wanted, shut down everyone else, and they’d still win games.  Jordan’s two highest scoring games of his career came against the Celtics.  Both games were losses.  Orlando pretty much let LeBron do whatever he wanted.  But when they shut down Mo Williams and Delonte West, even 42 points per game wouldn’t help the Cavs.  They let LeBron be the star, and it only bit them twice in six games.

On the other side, Cleveland was determined to stop a guy who wouldn’t be stopped in Dwight Howard.  And it killed them.  Howard only averaged 24 points per game in the Finals.  But every time the ball came in to him, the Cavs swarmed.  He’d casually kick the ball out to the open man on the perimeter, the guy who should have been covered by the double-teaming Cav, and 43 percent of the time, that open guy would knock down a wide open three pointer.

Rashard Lewis was huge in this series, hitting an astounding 58 percent from three point land.  Howard only averaged 62 percent, and half of his shots it seemed were dunks.  Turkoglu- 42 percent.  Rafer Alston, 43 percent.  Pietrus, 42.  The Magic were lights out from three, shooting a combined 43 percent from outside.

So why wouldn’t the Cavs let the Magic have the inside where they were already dominated?  Why wouldn’t they guard the perimeter?  On offense, why wouldn’t they drive the lane on Howard the shot-blocker who averaged a shade over 5 fouls a game?  Why didn’t they run more offense through Ilgauskas, who is in his own right a great free-throw shooter for a 7 footer?

Instead, the Cavaliers were content to shoot jumpers from 17+ feet.  They were statisfied to let the offense run solely through the hands of LeBron James.  They wanted him to make every play.  Be it a drive for a dunk, a step back jumper, or draw the double team and dish to a guy who would settle for one of these longer distance shots.  Sure they were out sized by the Magic.  But the Magic’s players, just like any other in this league, are limited to 6 fouls per game.  If you drive enough, and get high percentage shots, or even a couple of free throws, it beats all of these missed outside shots.

It’s easy to sit back and say that Mike Brown, the Cavs’ coach didn’t tell them to drive the ball, or to defend the perimeter.  Let’s do the math here though- 66 wins, 16 losses in the regular season.  8-0 through the first two rounds of the playoffs.  Hard to pin the guy as being the reason the Cavs lost this series.  In the end, the Cavaliers just didn’t show up.  They didn’t play like the expected NBA champions so many(including myself) were painting them.  And consider this too- if a casual fan such as myself can see where Cleveland went wrong, I’ll wager an NBA head coach- the coach of the year, as a matter of fact- could see it too.  I can’t put the blame there.

42, 8, and 8.  LeBron’s average stat line through 5 games is legendary.  But in a couple of years, no one will remember the performance he put on as he willed his team to a 10 win showing in the playoffs.  They’ll only remember the 4 that the Cavs couldn’t win.  It pains me to see a guy with talent like his fall short.  But just remember: there’s always next season.

Edit: So we’re clear, and to avoid any hate mail: I LIKE Dwight Howard, hope the dude wins several rings.  I’ll be pulling for them to beat the Lakers.  Honestly.  And I think they will.  I’ve just been watching LeBron since high school, and the dude is dynamite in a basketball jersey.  If you liked this post, do please re-blog/re-tweet it.

1.Weightlifting commentator at the Olympic snatch and jerk event: “This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warmup and it was amazing.”

2.Ted Walsh, horse racing commentator: “This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother.”

3.Grand Prix race announcer: “The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is identical to the one in front of the similar one in back.”

4.Greg Norman, pro golfer: “I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.”

5.Ringside boxing analyst: “Sure there have been injuries and even some deaths in boxing – but none of them really that serious.”

6.Baseball announcer: “If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.”

7.Basketball analyst: “He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn’t like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces.”

8.At a trophy ceremony for a 1998 BBC TV boat race: “Ah, isn’t that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is hugging the cox of the Oxford Crew.”

9.Metro Radio, college football: “Julian Dicks is everywhere. It’s like they’ve got 11 Dicks on the field.”

10.US Open TV commentator: “One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing so well is that, before each final round his wife takes out his balls and kisses them…Oh my God, what have I just said?!!”

Credit to the original writer, George Greene, Boston Sports History Examiner