A Fantasy Football Story
Twas the night before the playoffs, when all through the league
Not a team was at rest, from the top to bottom seed.
The waiver wire was scoured by the first and the last,
In hope that other owners had seen a gem but passed.
The sleepers were nestled all starting or benched,
Their owners all hoping their playoff spot had been clinched.
My squad with its handcuffs and outright studs,
Had made no bench room to hang onto duds.
When out on the wire there was a sudden flash of light,
An owner had errantly released Roddy White!
My fingers clicked quickly and Randy Moss was released,
I swore for a moment my heart’s beating had ceased!
“With Roddy my corp of receivers can’t be beat!
My opponents will surely taste bitter defeat!”
My lineup was set and a smile crossed my face;
I knew a certain trophy would reside at MY place.
Two weeks flew by with my team in the lead,
With a group this stacked, even rankings received no heed.
The championship was mine, only one game remained,
It was all but over, no Sunday scores had been changed.
I had a slim lead but Monday Night was all mine,
As the Atlanta Falcons had a 13 and a half point line.
They faced Tennessee at 8:30 on ESPN,
(That’s right, I said it- I’M A COMPANY FAN)
Cortland Finnegan, the punk, was blanketing Hot Rod,
Though I didn’t think he could be stopped, save by the hand God.
I grimaced when Roddy left the game in the first half,
And groaned when my opponent had the last laugh.
Roddy White had 3 catches, yardage: 29-
And my opponent had claimed what once was mine;
Randy Moss, Fantasy Zombie- 8 for a buck-oh-five.
The final: my team- 98. His- 109.
When things go exactly as you’d hoped, or, Why I love fantasy football
I went into my personal league this year with the #4 overall pick. I think I dominated the draft, getting every sleeper I really, really wanted. My first pick was a no-brainer in a PPR league. With Chris Johnson, Adrian Peterson, and Maurice Jones-Drew all off the board, I got the guy I’d have taken at #2 behind CJ: I got Ray Rice.
I really expected(and schemed) my second round pick, I expected to land either Randy Moss or Miles Austin at #13 overall. When Frank Gore fell that far- one of the league’s few remaining true #1 RBs who also catches an enormous number of passes, I was shocked, and snatched him immediately.
More than Gore at #13, I couldn’t believe Randy Moss was still available in round 3. And Miles Austin in round 4. And Shonn Greene in 5. Welker in 6, Ryan Mathews in 7, and Joe “I’m Wacco for” Flacco was a great value pick after 8 QBs were already gone. Got him in the 8th. Celek in the 9th was predictable, but LeSean McCoy in the 10th? Amazing. Mike Sims-Walker, Arian Foster, Derrick Mason, Dwayne Bowe, Mike Wallace, and Johnny Knox all fell outside of their ADP. I wound up with the 49ers defense despite being the last to draft a D/ST, and landed Stephen Gostkowsi to kick in the final round. 2 sleepers I had to pass up on in favor of Mike Wallace and Johnny Knox will still be there if one or two of my players don’t pan out.
This is the start to a very, very good year.
